The chains I'm in

It's the first day of school. It feels like I'm a new student in my own classroom because I'm nervous. It's weird feeling. I've been teaching in this school for five years and it's the only time I felt like this. Maybe because of the fear I got last February. I really did emphasized in the orientation with my kids that they need to be good and responsible pupils so that life would be less complicated for me and that I won't be reprimanded by our madam just because of my pupils' misbehavoir. It's really mixed emotions now I don't really want to feel this way because I want to forget everything. Now, I pray harder that I would forgive myself and forgive her for the pain she have given me. I wish I would just erased that in my brain and hope that It will not happen again. It's a new beginning anyway I'm giving myself days to convince myself that everything will be fine and that this batch of kids are good. Think positive carms. You can do it carms. Pray for me pls. thanks